Last one inspired by Linkbait this night. 'War kittens' are from the mind of a Chris.
1. Fluffy McStubbingtons, who famously refused to aid Caesar in conquering the Celts in order to focus on what he saw as the greater menace: a long string of yarn. Caesar opted not to punish the kitten on account of its wee little paws.
2. Lord Tobius, hailed by some as Sun Tzu reborn. But many find it difficult to perceive the visual difference between biding one’s time for strategic reasons and a simple desire to lie in a sunbeam all day.
3. Freya, the Norse goddess of fertility and war, was known to be accompanied by many assorted cats and to be the one who chose the slain of the battlefield to make merry in Valhalla. Some scholars theorise that her cats may have assisted her in this role; others, of a more traditional ilk argue that the cats merely lay on the chests of the slain, purring and awaiting pettage.
4. Harold Godwinson, the very temporary king of England, was ever accompanied by the noble Bojangles – so much so that the feline rode on his steed during the Battle of Hastings. Which begs the question: did the arrow that lodged itself in Harold’s eye really originate with a Norman bow, or was it a political statement by Bojangles? The two were known to argue frequently over whether Bojangles was allowed to recline on the back of the throne.
5. As dogs were to Hitler, so cats were to Stalin. The crazed dictator was so fond of a tabby named Lenny that he made him his premier military advisor after sending the rest of his generals to Siberia for having murder in their hearts. But Lenny disappeared just prior to the implementation of Operation Barbarossa. Did he defect to Germany? Or was he forced to go on the lam after stumbling across starving former peasantry?
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